Archive for May, 2008
Should You Settle?
A friend just sent me this article from Lori Gottlieb about “settling for Mr. Good Enough.” In it, she writes (bold emphasis mine):
Every woman I know—no matter how successful and ambitious, how financially and emotionally secure—feels panic, occasionally coupled with desperation, if she hits 30 and finds herself unmarried.
…
Whether you acknowledge it or not, there’s [...]
Anatomy of a chance meeting
“I’m sorry, am I in your way?” I turned to address the blonde girl that was standing to my right. My peripheral vision is really incredible and I had noticed her standing there for a minute or so.
“Oh no, I’m just waiting for the soup,” she replied. I was in the process of scooping out [...]
The Comparison Effect
Speaking of comparing dates to ex’s, here’s an interesting phenomenon. If a girl dates a real asshole, then dates you, you’ll find that you can get away with almost anything slightly above the asshole meter and she’ll love you for it.
Or to put it more formally: if a person has a negative experience with one [...]
Is this a date?
I was out with a new friend one day and we started talking about dating. It was an odd topic to talk about with someone I barely knew, but that’s the way the conversation flowed and that’s the way we went. She laughed as she told me about the time that she didn’t even realize [...]
Comparing Dates to Ex’s
So what do you think about this one? Whenever you date someone new, do you find yourself comparing them to previous ex’s?
Me, I think it’s kind of inevitable and even, maybe, natural? It doesn’t have to be comparing the new girl to a specific ex, but perhaps specific traits of all your ex’s.
Maybe one of [...]
Would you trust your parents to help you date?
The idea of marriage as the expected result of falling in love with someone special is a relatively new concept in most cultures around the world. Seemingly for as long as there has been written word, arranged marriages have been mentioned. Arranged marriages reflect the belief in marriage as a social contract between families (and [...]
Compliance in dating
Compliance is a very interesting topic. So interesting, in fact, that psychologists still study it to this day. The definition of compliance is, “the act or process of complying to a desire, demand, proposal, or regimen or to coercion”. What is it that makes people do things that other people ask? It could be a [...]
Do As I Say, Not As I Do
I am going to tell you to be confident and ask the guy you are interested in out. Walk up to him and tell him you want to take him to dinner. Tell him that you think his shirt looks great, that you like his new haircut.
But I have never asked a guy [...]
The role of an ex
I have to admit, I’m horrible at breakups. It doesn’t matter if I’m the dumper or the dumpee, I find breakups to be very hard to deal with. Either I’m breaking her heart or she’s breaking mine; both options suck. There’s the guilt of being the one to end it and the endless questions associated [...]
The Good Friend
Everyone needs a good friend they can turn to for relationship advice. And everyone you date should have a friend like that too.
In fact, it’s a red flag when a girl I date doesn’t have a good, sensible friend like that. Who’s going to tell her she’s being paranoid, unreasonable, or irrational? Who’s going to [...]
