What do you want?
When you’re single, it’s easy to get stuck pondering how great it would be to have someone. Or sometimes, how much less life would suck if you had someone. But most of the time these are just small fantasies, picturing someone to go the movies with or someone to cuddle up to at night. Have you ever stopped and thought about the type of person that would truly make you happy? What if someone said they could guarantee that you’d meet the perfect person tomorrow if you could just explain exactly what you want? Could you do it?
For most of us, a question like that usually leads to a few mental pictures. If your first thoughts had to do with looks or sex, feel comforted that you’re human like the rest of us. It’s natural for your mind to go there since society places such a high value on these things. So let’s assume that everyone wants someone “hot” and someone who’s good in bed. Then what? Don’t be surprised if it takes you a little while to compile a list of attributes that your perfect other would have because chances are that you’ve not really thought about it.
If you’re single at the moment, I’d recommend starting to think about this…write it down if you have to. Make the description of these qualities as vivid as possible so that a complete picture begins to form. You may be surprised at what you come up with when you really stop to consider the things that are important to you. After doing this exercise myself, here’s what I came up with:
My perfect girl has a career, not just a job. She is comfortable with her place in the world and doesn’t feel the need to apologize for who she is. Her beliefs are based on logical explorations and not on tradition or dogma. When we have a conversation, we can disagree with each other’s point of view and yet never get upset. She’s at least as intelligent as me, and possibly even more intelligent. Her sense of humor is sweet with a tinge of sarcasm that sneaks out every once in a while. When we come across babies, little kids, or puppies, she lets out an, “awwwwww” without worrying who’s around to hear. She likes to sneak kisses when no one is looking and delights in sneaking up on me when I’m not paying attention. Her health is important to her so she doesn’t smoke, do drugs, or drink excessively.
She has an active imagination and is open-minded to new experiences and new ways of thinking. Non-judgmental, she’s supportive even when she doesn’t necessarily agree with me. Her belief is that life is full of possibilities and moves forward with little hesitation. She has a lively spirit and isn’t worried about what people think of her. Her style of dress depends on her mood, ranging from preppy and professional to relaxed and playful.
She makes me feel like I can do anything and encourages me in all of my pursuits, though always making sure I understand that she expects the same. We can spend an evening in, cooking dinner, talking, and curling up on the couch to watch a movie just as well as going out on the town. Her smile is infectious and she’s instantly liked by everyone she meets.
Most of all, she doesn’t need me in her life…she wants me in her life. Without me, she is absolutely fine; strong, passionate, and independent. She can do anything that she puts her mind to without anyone else’s help, including mine. But she wants me there, she wants to share her life with me, she wants to make time to see me no matter how busy her schedule gets. That is, so long as I treat her the way she knows she deserves to be treated; she won’t stand for anything less and that’s part of what I love about her.
What about you? If you could meet the perfect person tomorrow, how would you recognize him/her?
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Zachie boy -I can’t decide if I want to pinch your cheeks or poke you in the eye for being so idealist! Your description is so fluffy of your ideal woman that i fear you may miss the real deal when it comes your way!