Comments on: Dating Definition: cougar

By: VAL

VAL — Thu, 26 Jan 2012 13:32:09 +0000

I AM 48 AND MY BOYFRIEND IS 28, WE HAVE BEEN TOGETHER FOR 5 YEARS AND ARE VERY MUCH IN LOVE. HE IS VERY MATURE AND MY CHILDREN WHO ARE GROWN LOVE HIM AND RESPECT HIM. THIS RELATIONSHIP HAS BEEN THE BEST ONE I’VE EVER BEEN IN. YES IVE DATED OLDER MEN THAT TURNED OUT TO BE MEAN, CHEATERS,USERS AND SO ON. HE HAS SHOWN NONE OF THES QUALITIES. HE IS A VERY HARD WORKING MAN THAT TAKES CARE OF ME ALL THE WAY. AND NO I DONT USE HIM FOR MONEY BECAUSE I HAVE AND MAKE MY ON. FINANCIALLY WE DO THINGS TOGETHER AND IT IS NEVER ONE SIDED. THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH A YOUNGER MAN DATING AN OLDER WOMAN. OLDER MEN HAVE BEEN DATING YOUNGER WOMEN FOR DECADES. SO I DONT SEE THE PROBLEM AT ALL.

By: Cindy

Cindy — Sun, 15 May 2011 04:53:26 +0000

I don’t see the problem with this-men have been dating younger women for years-but now that women are turning the tables..there has to be discussions on this? I am almost 41 and most people think I am way younger. Younger guys hit on me all the time–a 25 year old recently that said his ex was 38. Seems that anything goes now adays as long as no one gets hurt and expects too much. Live and love.

By: Lexi

Lexi — Thu, 09 Dec 2010 16:37:39 +0000

I am 36 dating a 25 yr old and we act like a normal couple. Things are great between us and I would continue things as is, but I do feel that one day he will feel like I am too old for him and want to go another way in his life. At this point I am not sure what I would want either b/c at times he does show his age and it makes me think but for the most part he is very mature and very good with my kids. There are no guarantees in ANY relationship, so I decided to just make the best of it. I mean if I am happy and he is happy than I really don’t care what other people think.

By: Cynthia

Cynthia — Tue, 12 Oct 2010 20:49:33 +0000

I am 36, my boyfriend is 23. We’ve known each other for about 4 years and have been together for a year and a half. Soulmate? Never knew they existed until he came along. We communicate very well. We have fun together. I’m more active than he is most of the time! He can barely keep up with me!! He has always said he could never date anyone his own age, as they are never mature enough. His family is supportive; friends & co-workers have been supportive as well. We are now planning our wedding. Life is short, ya’ll..do what you want. Be with the person that makes you happy. Approval is important on some level, but at the end of the day..not so much. =)

By: Aiden Sabine

Aiden Sabine — Mon, 09 Aug 2010 00:19:15 +0000

Isn’t the rule half one’s age plus 7? So 28 to 46 is close.

The dynamics of this whole age thing have probably been beaten to death. Between consenting adults if this is what they want, who are we to judge. Even when the norms are followed to make everyone happy, relationships still fail at an alarming rate so why even worry.

As for parents and friend, if you can’t defend your choices, don’t see anyone. Period.

By: Lindsay

Lindsay — Sun, 08 Aug 2010 13:55:55 +0000

I definitely agree with Alex. If you want a sexual relationship with a younger guy, fine. Even if you want an emotional relationship, go for it, but don’t expect it to be like a regular relationship. Don’t expect to meet their friends, definitely don’t expect to meet their parents (I suspect a lot of “stay away from my son you filthy whore!” and such comments) and certainly don’t expect marriage. If you try to make it more than it really is, it won’t last. Even if you do get married…it won’t last if your age is too far apart.
Which brings me to one last thing: DONT go for guys who are young enough to be your son. That’s disgusting. You may as well go out and date your son then, it would be just as disgusting. Be realistic.

By: Steph

Steph — Sun, 13 Jun 2010 15:54:35 +0000

I’m 40 and my boyfriend is 19. I’m very happy but it is work. Too bad family and friends don’t understand our happiness.

By: Sabrina

Sabrina — Mon, 05 Apr 2010 22:39:49 +0000

I’m 50 and married to a 21 year old. It works if he wants the relationship is mature and in love.

By: Daphne

Daphne — Fri, 14 Aug 2009 05:04:46 +0000

If the relationships are more substantial than “cougar-boy toy”, then yes, there is mutual respect and love. My boyfriend is 28; I’m 46. He is my heart and he can’t stop bragging about me to his friends. (he is also 6’3 and I’m 4’11..hmmm..) He respects me being a business woman and I respect him for his intellect and spontanaeity. Tonight he told me he hopes that we will be together a long time. I hope the same.

By: Alex

Alex — Wed, 17 Jun 2009 14:33:36 +0000

The thing about the cougar-boy toy relationship is that cougars shouldn’t expect that their boy toys would marry them. Ultimately, boy toys would look for someone their age. Also, cougars shouldn’t expect their boy toys to flaunt them or even introduce them to their families, especially if they have conservative and old-fashioned parents.