Rants
Land of the Misfit Toys
My married friends ask, “Hey, how is the dating thing going?”
My reply is stolen from a remark at a cocktail party, but I love it, and use it: “Oh, it’s like living in the Land of the Misfit Toys!” Everyone laughs, but I look for the few who have that knowing smile, for they are [...]
I love it when…
I love it when you look at me and smile that sly smile you have. I know the smile is meant only for me, and it makes me melt every single time. Keep doing it.
I love it when you wear my shirts. Especially effective is when the shirt is way too big for you and [...]
what FACEBOOK tells me
You’re an asshole.
Plain.
Not so simple.
In fact, you’re an insecure narcisist with no less than 50 uploaded profile photos of your various pouts and poses to prove it. You even catalogue your ex-girlfriends with captions below. Sexy.
I never knew FB was a vehicle for name dropping, til I perused your profile. So what if you’re some [...]
busting the BUDDY system
“Just so we’re clear, I’m not in the market for new guy friends.” I try to make eye-contact. I figure I’ve got nothing to hide, since my new motto is to live like I’ve got nothing to lose. “We’re either dating OR we’re not. There’s no friendship fallback at the end of this tunnel.”
“Huh?” Grant [...]
The internal struggle
I’ve been waiting for today for a long time. I haven’t seen her in so long…something like ten months. There was a spark then, and just arranging for lunch today I can feel that it’s still there. We’d been trying to plan this get together for almost two months since we first reconnected, and an [...]
reBOUNDing
Mr. Write’s got this theory that I’m a reBOUND reWOUND addict.
He may be right.
See folks, Mr. Write constantly kicks my ass about how I have this nasty habit of hitting the rewind button when it comes to my dating life by reBOUNDing. It’s my coping mechanism. As in “coping” with my commitment-phobia. Especially after tossing [...]
When I ask you out
When I ask you out, it’s because there’s something about you that I find attractive. It may be your sense of style, it may be your personality, but there’s just something that has inspired me to get to know you better. And that’s the purpose of asking you out: to get to know you better.
When [...]
Let’s Dance
Damn it. Now I’m curious. Interested…in that way. I did NOT expect that. You queued up the music, and started the dance. And there I was, stepping on the dance floor as Chatty Cathy, thinking all we were doing was catching up, pleasantly surprised at how much we still had in common now in our [...]
spooning
It kills me that I had to upgrade.
I went from BOSE to SHURE. Had to ditch the top-of-the-line noise cancellation headphones for the “industry strength” noice-isolation gear. The fact that I even know the difference tells you just how serious I am — about sleep.
See, it wasn’t so bad when the snoring was intermittent. Even [...]
Cheating is a Cop Out
Remember what we used to do kids who cheated on the playground? We kicked their ass, and they were relegated to play by themselves for months. You know why? Because cheating is selfish, and as a tribal species, we know at the primal level, selfish is dangerous. That’s why we set up rules. Imagine if [...]
