I have written about Sheila in the past, and while we always were friends, there was a period of time that we stopped communicating. Why? Well, she stopped answering my texts, and I stopped trying. I didn’t know why she stopped talking to me on a regular basis, and while in my head, I was trying not to take it personally, my heart was not going to be a compliant follower. I felt rejected, and seeing pictures of her doing different things with other people, kind of bothered me. Nonetheless, I felt it best to let things go. We might instant message one another from time to time, but nothing more. I didn’t want to be disappointed when things didn’t work out.
Then, one day, poof! She’s back.
I go jogging with a group of people most Saturdays and one Saturday, Sheila showed up.
At first I was a little angry.
I had just gotten to the point where I was ready to forget her, and move on, then . . . There she is again.
A few weeks later, we went out. It wasn’t a date, but we were getting together to watch a soccer match on television. I was reticent, but I felt I had to try again. Then we went out again, and again. They weren’t dates. We were just going to a concert, then another one. Then we went out for drinks. I was hanging out with Sheila 2-3 times a week, and it was great!!
None of these were dates, but it felt nice to be around her again.
Then we went to a Halloween party, and this happened. . .
“I know there was a time that we weren’t talking, and I’m sorry about that,” said Sheila. The comment dropped as though we were talking about the weather or the next soccer match.
“But, I don’t want that to happen again,” she said, “I was trying to figure a lot of things out, and I didn’t handle things very well, but I completely adore having you as a friend. I know I want you in my life.”
I looked her in the eyes, and I knew she meant it. But I didn’t know it what it meant. . .
Was I getting the ‘let’s just be friends talk’?
If that was the case, I was prepared to handle it. Sure I might be disappointed, but I was determined to get over it and not jam up a friendship.
“Look, I can handle almost anything, but we have to communicate,” I said, “you’ve got to talk to me. I want you in my life, and if it’s not going to work out the way I may want it to, then I just need to get the hell over it.”
Sheila glanced up and to the left, then looked back at me. “Yes, but I think it’s vice-versa. I mean maybe you should let go and not worry about where it’s going. Whatever THIS is, we’ll figure it out. . .
“Whatever THIS is, we’ll figure it out.”
She smiled. I smiled.
I felt safer in this relationship – whatever it was going to be.
We were talking, really talking about how we were feeling.
I felt some resolution, kind of. I mean we’re friends, but . . .
Is this how a real relationship begins? Is this how a romance begins?